B.A.N.A.N.A.S

So as I write, I am sitting at a Barnes and Nobles bookstore.

The woman sitting across from me has been on her phone/computer for the last hour. I would say that she is in her mid-thirties and she is a pretty nice individual. I say this because we saw one another in the bathroom and she warned me about a really nasty stall! Bless her, because y'all know I have a major bathroom phobia.

Her issue begin with the fact that she has a distinctive [squeaky] voice that tends to rise about all of the other mumbles.

So, when she first sat down at her table, she asked the man behind her "if he knew where she could find a payphone." He offered to allow her to use his, but she declined saying that her phone call was "personal."

But I guess the call couldn't wait, because about a half hour ago, she got on the phone with someone and began talking about Jesus. To spare you details, the conversation was very positive, which seemed about right. She looks like a sweet woman (yes, I am judging the book by its cover). She has thin rimmed glasses, no make-up, a brown snug hat, a comfy larger sweater, old sneakers, and mom-jeans. 

Immediately after this conversation, she clicked over on the line with someone else. As soon as she began talking to the new person, she called the other woman (phone caller #1) "gossipy" and then went on to tell her friend that she had to call some dude a "b----a--nig--." She goes on to say that he started whining and yelling at her, but she had to keep on going in on him! Long and short without going into too many details - she cursed dude out real good and all of B&N heard it.

I mean the curse out was so bad that there were a few men sitting around her with disgusted looks on their face. I don't know if they were disgusted with the lady's mouth or the fact that she took away some brother's dignity, pride, and everything in between.  She then followed up the discussion with talking about how fast some chick is. Wowzzahs...I didn't see that kind of curse out coming...

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