my struggles with worry and fear

During the day I am in Paradise. All day, my mom, Neiko, and I create our own little world and when Mike comes home the possibilities and conversation are endless. It's like my piece of heaven on earth...but then the house gets silent...

The night time falls and my mind wonders and my fingers start roaming the Internet. What do I find? The worst possible situation of anything and everything. A simple cough is a deadly bronchitis disease that slowly eats at one's liver and lungs. My love of  research is helpful (and sometimes impressive), but it's also a harmful addiction leading me, at times, to mental torment. 

The road often followed is the road to fear. Two nights ago, this all came  to an ugly head. I literally lost it. After poking, prodding, and listening to my sleeping baby's breath - my mom confronted me. I admitted to her my fears and we talked and prayed for a long while. 

It was a rough and beautiful night. One that is stored in my memory chest forever. My mother and I talking in the dead of night while my sweet boys slept in peace. That said, later, during my 230 am feeding session I began looking up scriptures to meditate on. I found about 50/300 scriptures on fear (with the help of bible cafe). 

The scripture that really stuck out for me (and helped me have the most incredible peaceful slumber last night) was Psalm 91 (vs 4-8 specifically):

"He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection. Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor the arrow that flies in the day. Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday. Though a thousand fall at your side, though ten thousand are dying around you, these evils will not touch you." Psalm 91:4-8 NLT 

For those that are fighting against a fearful and worrisome life, please read more at: http://www.womensbiblecafe.com/2011/05/50-scripture-verses-on-fear/#sthash.616AVMca.dpuf

Xoxoxox, 

SSS